Tuesday, 2 December 2008

Piss Statements

Above, a thing for a thing. Something of a cork in the hole to pass time til next week's new flesh & bones, not got the time this week...my schedule is stacked! Stacked like the pile of at least 7 pocket scraps with words, feelings and beyond (or back) sat chilling in my room. I say chilling because it's like a meal preparation see, you gotta keep the ingreds in the fridge before you make a dish because otherwise you get half-baked ideas and gone off prawns. I'm tipping that bird today to get some stuff off my chest tho, this was going to be a future piece but i'm bringing it out as a sketch - hot on the outside, frozen in the middle.


I'm pissed at the world for pissing on my chips

Wouldn't cross the street to watch you piss in a teacup

I'm so pissed off

I pissed it up the wall

Left a lanky streak of piss

Yep I piss on the street

Yep I piss on the seat

I'm a piss artiste

Pissing on bonfires

Pissed on beer

Pissed to meet you, what's your nime?

Friday, 14 November 2008


More Flesh & Bones next week as it happens. In the meantime, I did a skit skat happy slap on the latest Guy Ritchie talkie, RocknRolla. You can read it's pages in virtual reality format via this link on the MP site...chav it?


More power to you!

Thursday, 13 November 2008


I've got the taste in my teeth, hopefully another new one later today. Rappenin' is what's happenin' also, check out myspace.com/thefarttwins to taste "Something Creepin' Out of Me". Itsmountpleasant.com got a lil update last week too, fruits are fruityful.

Monday, 3 November 2008

Flesh & Blood

Something creepin' out of me

Did a new rap on the megabus, it's my bleakest work to date. Called "something creepin' out of me". Here's the first page of four and a half from my book of rhymes, my book of rhymes...

Somethin' creepin' out of me
Not a piss, not a shit
I know what you're thinkin'
But that ain't it
Nah it's deeper than that
It's past my soul
Nestled up sleeping
A toad in the hole
Damn, a mole in the hole
Yeh, a stoal in the bowl
Such a foal in the hole

And it ain't comin' out
It's locked in tight
I feel so queasy

Nah somethin' ain't right
You can hear it at night
Clawin' the walls
Scratchin' cross-hatchin'
Nah somethin' ain't right
This alien flailin'

Peakin' to the ceiling
Peelin' back down
An' just kneelin', kneelin'
Checkin' it's watch
An' biding it's time
I've been waitin' too long
When will it be mine
But It's his watch not mine
Tho' I wish it was mine

What time is it Trevor?
'Bout time to recline
But it's never that time
I can never be mine
For I'll always be his

Somethin' creepin' out of me
Not a shit nor a piss

It gets intenser and betterer from there on in. New Flesh & Bone tomozz, new one just below this one til then

Real Umbrella Man

Sunday, 26 October 2008

Best of Spam

Here is a round up of the best junk email sender names that I have in my inbox today...

Gay Slater
Desmond Huffman
Octavio Dudley
Caitlin Sneed
Ferdinand Trent
Egbert Shu-Fan
Dollie Shoemaker (maybe she should get together with Egbert Shu-Fan?)
Jo Bacon
Furman Sherman

And the best junk email subject header goes to...

'I'm so rich I just bought Justin Timberlake house'

Wow! THE Justin Timberlake house?? I wonder if it's named after THE Justin Timberlake.

This was a time filling escapade to allow ink to dry on a SIC ALPS poster I just did for Paris, France. Ya heard that right. I'll post it here maybe or more likely on the mount pleasant site. Flesh and Bone newbies coming later this week...

Tuesday, 21 October 2008

The inevitable return of Bloopa Real

Oh man. I started wording on a new rap today with view to full garage band production. Think "Amy's Winehouse" gone global. It's going to be called "Turn in da road" and it's about a new dance sensation that's sweeping the nation inspired by the legendary car-based manoevre, the 3-point turn. The very dance that humanised the austere 4-wheel direction alteration method and gave the power key back to our local hero, 2-legs. I'm auditioning as of now for parts in the music video, applicants should have a strong sense of riddim and a clean driving license.

Sample lyric:

It's the turn in da road
Jus' lighten your load
It's a groove infusion

An' it looks bamboozlin'

Friday, 17 October 2008


What it is!

I'm coming out in blogspots! But don't worry it most definitely IS contagious. Here's a page for my comic strip, Flesh & Bone. Check it out in all it's entirety, I be updating in here about every week or more. No quibbles please if I drop the ball, subscription is free and I beg your pardon I never promised you a rose garden.

The last two posts underneath this one are the freshest Flesh and Bones, previously unseen by human eyes everywhere. Two more are inked up and ready to despatch, we talking Tuesday or similar next week to post that boast. Some people are saying that the small picture layout of this page is a flailing turd of events, I couldn't figure how to make it bigger so you'll just have to click the thumbs or get your biccynoculars out. Apologies about how the tone of this piece is in your face and take it or leave it-y, I don't know where I became so idly confrontational. On the internet I guess.

Sometimes I might put things on here that don't fall under the 'Flesh & Bone' brand, like thoughts and feelings or similar items. It's fine though isn't it? I have a tale I widdled on the train about ZOO magazine, that's coming soon and more besides. Get the wider picture at www.itsmountpleasant.com

That's it!
Joe Blogs

Chicken or the egg?



Plunging Neckline

Room Temp

Not my onions

In da club

Sun hot every day


Once you pop

Nigh Times


Don't spook the horse

New Shades

Patch Adams

The one with the rent money

Game Face

Gandhi's Flip Flop

Flesh is gainfully unemployed

Bone is gainfully employed

You're being a bagel, Brian

Savoury Tooth

Nom Nom Nom

In the beginning...